Forgiveness
By Laurel Head
What is forgiveness? Forgiveness is defined in Strong’s as freedom, pardon, deliverance, forgiveness, liberty, remission. It is used in the Bible in the following ways: release from bondage or imprisonment; forgiveness or pardon of sins (letting them go as if they had never been committed), remission of the penalty. Let’s look at some questions concerning forgiveness.
When should I forgive someone? Some are of the opinion that we should forgive everyone, whether that person has asked for forgiveness or not. Others are very reluctant to forgive someone. Let’s look at what the Bible has to say on this matter. Matthew 18:15-17 explains what to do in a scenario where someone sinned and was told about their sin by a brother in Christ. There were four options that could have happened. Either that brother would have immediately repented and been forgiven, he would have repented in the presence of witnesses that would have affirmed the fact that he sinned and been forgiven, he would have been rebuked by the church, repented, and been forgiven, or he would have not repented, not been forgiven, and been out of fellowship with the church. In any one of those scenarios, the brother that was confronting the brother that sinned can’t forgive him until he repents and asks for forgiveness. We should have a forgiving attitude, but only forgive when the person repents and asks for forgiveness.
How should I forgive someone? Matthew 18:21-35 is a great illustration of how someone should be forgiven. This is a parable of a servant that had a debt that was almost impossible to pay back to the master. The master was going to sell that servant, his family, and all that he had until the payment could be paid back. But the servant begged the master to have patience and he would pay him back. The master was moved with compassion and forgave the debt. But the servant had someone who owed him very little and went and laid hands on him and threw him in prison till the debt was paid. The master was told about this and punished the unforgiving servant because he didn’t forgive his fellow servant. Verse 35 reads, “So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.” This means that when someone has sinned against us and repents and asks for forgiveness, we should forgive them with our whole heart and not hold a grudge against them. Because we sinned against God, but He sent His only Son to die for us so we could have a chance to live with Him eternally. If we don’t forgive our brother, that is comparable to God not sending Jesus and letting us go to hell. It is that serious.
Why should I forgive someone? Simply put, we should forgive those who have sinned against us because we want to be forgiven by our heavenly Father so we can go to Heaven (Matthew 6:14-15). Put yourself in this position: you asked someone for forgiveness because you were deeply repentant and sorry for what you had done and you wanted that sin out of your life and out of your mind. But they didn’t forgive you even though you begged them to. How would you feel? How would that sin weigh on you? Now put yourself in this situation: you asked God to forgive you for sinning against Him because you were deeply sorry about it and you couldn’t stop thinking that you had sinned against your Creator. You knew that He forgave you of that sin (James 5:16; 1 John 1:9) and you felt like you could actually sleep at night. This is the difference between forgiving someone and refusing to forgive them.
Hopefully, this covers most questions about forgiveness and helps to make clearer what forgiveness actually is, when forgiveness should be extended, how someone should be forgiven, and why someone should be forgiven. Also, this should provoke more thought as to what you are doing when you forgive someone rather than it being a reaction to someone saying, “Can you please forgive me?” It represents what Christians should do to be forgiven by God and how God treats us when we fall short and come before Him asking for forgiveness.